My happiest memory of childhood was my first birthday in reform school. This teacher took an interest in me. In fact, he gave me the first birthday presents I ever got: a box of Cracker Jacks and a can of ABC shoe polish.
Funny is not a color. Being black is only good from the time you get from the curtain to the microphone.
The cost of living is going up and the chance of living is going down.
Don't order one for the road, because the road is already laid out.
You can't expect to hit the jackpot if you don't put a few nickels in the machine.